Secrets Revealed

I just finished an amazing book called Mother Had a Secret. I recommend it to anyone. The eye opener for me was how the author, Tiffany Fletcher, exposed her true feelings on her ruling emotions of guilt, anger and hate. The true story of this woman growing up in an LDS home with a mother of multiple personalities will change your view on perfection, forgiveness, and Savior-like love. The kind of love that doesn't need a disclaimer on it. The kind of love that doesn't need to be earned or fought for. Tiffany is a remarkable woman with the kind of insight on life I wish I had. Here are some of my favorite quotes from her book. There are many more quotes, but I would have to basically re-post the entirety of her life's story. These are the quotes that impacted me, that I connected with through my own views of how most of us in Christian societies view ourselves and others.

"What would people think? That was the ultimate question; the question that kept us in our social lines of what was acceptable and right. Who would dare stray from the accepted norms when the neighbors were watching?"

"There was nothing I hated more about myself than the need to be perfect in the eyes of others. Although I often told myself that I didn’t care what they thought, the truth was that my life was ruled by how I thought others viewed me. Like a harsh slave master, propriety kept a watchful eye over me, as it did everyone. If I stepped out of line, it would crack its whip of ruthful public scorn and I would file back to my proper place and once again take up the labor of maintaining the community façade. "

"I believed that God gave everyone the option to choose to be or not to be who they were. Such an idea is easily accepted by many, but when we are confronted with those who fall outside of that perception we are faced with a dilemma: Do we blame them for being the way they are or do we accept the fact that sometimes things remain outside our control? "

"Lighthouses are unique. No two have the same stripes, and lenses are specifically cut for that lighthouse. A lens from a lighthouse in California would not fit one from Oregon or Virginia. They are each different with their own character and history. The number of cuts on the lens determines the ability for their light to pierce through the misty darkness, reaching ships farther from the shore. In like manner, the cuts we sustain through our trials, if accepted without complaint, allow us that ability to shine more brilliantly and reach the hearts of those around us who may be struggling."

Okay, basically all of chapter 15 also. "...your mother was your savior... A savior is anyone that takes up the cause of aiding another in ways that are far beyond the common. Jesus Christ was the Savior of mankind. He gave his life to save us from sin. Others are a savior to a lesser degree, saving us from other ills that we face in life...When someone is able to come along and make a stand against these things [the abuse that Tiffany's mother had experienced] it is a remarkable thing. Your mother stood against a lifetime of terrible things and, yes, she faltered, but she saved you from it."

"She chose to love where hatred would have been so much easier..."

Back in Black...and white.

It's been almost a year since I blogged. I got caught up on Facebook and personal journaling that I forgot about my blog. How is that possible? Well, it's not. I didn't really forget about it, just put it so far back in my mind that I didn't register the fact that I could still punch in my username and blog it up for no reason. I have no reason for this post, in fact, I don't even have much time. I think that's what happens when your life gets so overwhelmed with other things that your mind files away the things you onced enjoyed so you have brain space and power left to get things done. Well, since my 2 boys are napping and I just wrote in my personal journal I thought I'd call up the 'ol blog and post.

Hi there. It's been a while. I saw a woman on a random corner in my town today holding a sign that said "Pray to end abortion". She was reading scriptures, held in one hand, with the sign held up for the traffic to see with her other hand. I have a limited opinion on the subject. I am passionate about children and religion. I am also passionate about education. Not to make light of her message, but why do people who speak loudest about ending abortion always seem so uptight and against sex education in schools? I've yet to meet a single person who was pro-life that has voted or fought for sex ed in schools. As far as I'm concerned sex education that teaches abstinence is the only way to let kids know that's how you technically avoid unwanted pregnancies. Is it not? No sex = no pregnancies (barring medically induced pregnancies). Most kids don't go to church, but most kids do go to school. So, my solution. People who want to stop abortions need to want to teach kids about abstinence and safe sex. It's not just unmarried teens having abortions. It's adults and married couples too. A little bit of education is better than an opinion.

And that's my rant for today.

A Time of Thanksgiving

Thanks. We all seem to focus on this particular part of the holiday; the thanking part. We begin to realize all that we are thankful for. We come together to celebrate our thanks for country, family, God, etc. I know that I've never taken much thought about the ending of the word Thanksgiving. Giving. I sit here wondering about what it is to give. I know what I'm thankful for, but what about the giving part of this holiday? How do I give? When do I give? Do I give? What do I give? You get the point. So, I took a moment to think about what I am thankful for, and it made me realize that I do give. That this time of year, and year round, hopefully, I am giving. This is not a pat on the back, but a reassurance that while being thankful, I can also be giving.

The things that cover my thanks and giving.

My family. Could life be sweeter than it is now? I try hard not to let this time pass me by with wishful thinking of "someday" and "what if." I have an awesome best friend as a husband, two amazing little boys, and an entire extended family that loves one another. My husband and I know life, right now, is happening now, and it's great! We are happy. We are healthy. We know how to work hard and play hard. We know how to sacrifice and enjoy life on the meager student income we have. We know about ups and downs. We know about heart ache and joy. We know about failures and successes, trials and triumphs. We know about poopy diapers and teething. We know about band aids and bruises. We know about drive through and time outs. We know about no-nos and hugs. We know about firsts and lasts. We know about each other. We spend time with each other. We love each other. We trust each other. There is never a day that goes by where we, as a couple and as a family, haven't done something for one another. Plenty of opportunity to give, and give thanks.

My testimony in a living Savior, Jesus Christ. In His gospel and word as contained in the Bible, Book of Mormon, Doctrine and Covenants, Pearl of Great Price, and Ensign. In His living prophets that direct His work on this earth. In the restoration of His priesthood power, that I have witnessed change my life. In eternal families linked to our loving Father in Heaven and eternal family members. Knowing that I am a child of God, and I have a purpose and a divine heritage. A testimony that Christ died and lives for me. That Joseph Smith saw the resurrected Christ and the Father side by side. That he heard them speak, and open the heavens once again. For me. And for you. There is so much we can give with this knowledge, and many thanks we are indebted. Our service and voice is needed in people's lives who do not know the Savior.

So, with all of our thanks this holiday season, remember that to give is greater than to receive and we do have much to offer.

"The Widow's Mite" by James C. Christensen

Happy Thanks-giving.

My muse

There are few things that a mom can call her own once she is enveloped in a world of changing diapers, little people conversations, toddler cartoons, 2 am feedings, shower peep shows, potty-training, ankle leeching, lap buddies, food they'll eat, games they'll play, resturaunts they'll adapt to, their schedules, their toys, their clothes, their bath, their toilet, their movies, theirs theirs theirs. You get the point. Nothing feels like me.my.mine. For me, however, there is one thing that is a great escape. I've blogged about it before and it's music. Even when soaking in a hot bath do you ever feel like you're still on edge? The baby is still crying, the other child at the bathroom door knocking, the phone still ringing...etc. Put on your headphones and crank 'em up! WAAAAYYYY up!

There is a band in particular that has won my heart that I want everyone to know about. Okay, Led Zeppelin, sorry. I've been your faithful listener since I can remember and you'll always be that heart tugging, butterfly gut, mind reeling sound that I connect with, but I have to hand it to the British band, Muse. If you, Zeppelin, could be mastering your sound today, you'd probably be Muse. They are your younger brothers...they are genious, creative, fresh, and inspired by a mix of music genres rarely found in rock music today (much like what people experienced when Led Zeppelin hit the scene on British airwaves with their live BBC show in 1969). I've been following Muse since 2004. They've been aroud since 98-99 but never broke through to the American scene. And, they are still struggling to do so. Why? Could it be that we are still obsessing over watered down talent, pop sensations in leotards or rock groups singing soley about T'n'A? Are our minds muddled with too much media pushing Disney show graduates down our ear canals? Progressive rock has a new king. Muse. They've won best live show 7 times in the last 10 years,
their albums hit number one all around the globe and they're still cranking out the best rock sound to hit airwaves in a few decades!

A recent article in the music section of a local magazine FINALLY gave Muse some attention. I couldn't have been more proud of that article, so I will share it here (paraphrased) so everyone can understand what I think, and a handful of others in the American continent think about Muse.

"British band Muse is known and adored across the globe. With their new album, they attempt to finally break into the American hearts. All around the world, in nearly every major country, a single band has risen up and taken the long-abandonded mantle of the internationally mega-successful stadium-rock kings. That band is British chart-smashers Muse, who have taken fans and arenas alike by storm across the globe. That is, except for America.

With the long-awaited release of their newest studio album The Resistance, the band seems poised to finally cross the Atlantic and officially take over the States.

The Resistance is a big album in every way. It's been anticipated around the globe. The sounds, talent, and personalities are all larger-than-life.

The last three tracks of the record end with Muse's most ambitious project yet: a massive, three-movement symphony backed by a full orchestra playing a classically-inspired piece written in full by singer Matthew Bellamy.

When seperate, the three sections foucs on different strenghts and directions for the band, with the final piece being the most intimate and quiet music the band has recorded.

Time will tell if this release will be the one to finally break big in America. Even if we're behind the curve, their penchant for throwing caution to the wind and being over-the-top has already solidified them a spot in the greater annals of rock'n'roll history. It's exactly what makes for the pure fun that runs effortlessly through the entire album.

So give it a listen. Join The Resistance. It's just as surely one of the best albums of the year." -Brett Fieldcamp, BoydStreet magazine.